Basketball Classes

The weekend basketball class for kids in our apartment soared in popularity during COVID-19. Initially it was because it became the one venue where enough kids would turn up – back then, not too many kids would come down to play in the evening. But the bigger reason was that it provided some exercise – parents could see their always-at-home kids were ballooning up by endlessly munching and watching TV/streaming channels all day.

Kids as young as 5-6, who can barely toss the ball a few feet above their heads, are being sent to the class! The coach has smartly adapted these classes to try and ensure the kids move around, exert themselves, and last and definitely least, even learn to throw the ball in the general direction of the target.


The first thing he has them do in class is to take do a lap of the complex – no, the aim isn’t to warm up; rather, it is to ensure the kids tire themselves a bit. He tried incentivizing things by offering chocolates to the first few to cross the line. Of course, that only led to the kids cheating by taking shortcuts across the complex! It has set off a cat and mouse game. He’ll ask the biggest cheaters to do 3 laps; while the less dishonest ones have to do 2 laps. Or he’ll give chocolates only to the ones he feels are better. Though one wonders: in the land of the blind…

The coach also comes up with very amusing insults to use on the kids when they slack off. Or fail to learn. Or don’t even try. This may sound like a cruel thing, but even the kids enjoy it! Here’s why. Since all of them are equally culpable on most fronts, for every insult a kid faces, he/she gets to enjoy a dozen insults hurled at the others, at which point, not only will this kid laugh, but will also rub it in.


In any case, the kids do give it back to the coach. Like the time this girl finally managed to dribble a bit, then pointed at the coach and told him, “On your face, sir”. (Sheesh, they can’t get even get the English right for their insults: it’s “In your face”, dumbo). Their coach enjoys such banter, thus his response after feeling around his face, “What’s on my face? Oh yes, the insult from xxx”.

 

When my daughter’s school started conducting trials for different games, my daughter announced she had a good chance at being selected for the basketball team. After all, she goes for basketball classes, doesn’t she?

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