Small Differences Can Matter


As one grows up into an adult, the impact of a slight difference in age on the abilities of two people decreases gradually. So much so that by the time we are adults, we don’t think that a few months (or even a year or two) makes any difference to people’s abilities.

I guess that’s why what I saw today surprised me: I saw my 9 month old daughter play with her one and a half year old cousin. The difference in what each can do is staggering (obviously). Because, even that small difference in age (in adult age, that is) matters immensely for kids. Again an obvious thing when you think about it, but I was not used to thinking that way anymore (I’ve been an adult for too long) and so the realization was like a wake-up call.

That realization reminded me of a point that Malcolm Gladwell made in his book, Outliers. Gladwell’s point was that once kids go to school, we just start assuming that all kids in a particular class must be at the same stage of development. But that same class has students at both ends of the age band (one at year 5, and the other one who is almost done with year 5), so the older kid is significantly mature/advanced than the younger kid. Granted that schools do have cut off months of birth to join the schooling system just to reduce this mismatch, but the issue cannot be eliminated entirely.

I loved Gladwell’s books (Tipping Point, Blink) but now I am pissed with the guy for having pointed out the age difference between kids point. As if there were not enough things to worry about raising a kid, now I have a new item on my list. I know it’s not rational, that one shouldn’t shoot the messenger. But when one thinks of their own kid, who’s rational?

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